Great oogly moogly, kids, do we have a special treat for you today.  We have a new Myspace Interview with none other than punk zine legend Barry Scatton.  If you were ever a casual reader of the punk rock website Punkrocks.net, the name may ring a bell.  If not, just know that good old Barry is the guy who wrote this.

Buckle up and get ready, boys.  This is going to be a bumpy ride.

Hello Barry. Who are you?

I am the man who once rescued an aztec idol from a cave. I had 2 guides but one ran off. After the second one ran off I successfully absconded with the idol only to have it taken away by a rival french archeologist named belloq. He then had his indian army try to kill me. Somehow I was crafty enough to have arranged transportation by airplane and i managed to swing on a vine to safety across a river. Much to my dismay there was a snake under my airplane seat to which my pilot stated “oh thats just my friend reggie.” I hate snakes.

You used to write music reviews for the now defunct Punkrocks.net. What are your best memories of making people angry?

I used to get derrogatory emails sent from Bob Becker the owner and creator of Fearless Records. I think he thought I was unfair in how I critiqued his bands. If i was paid 1 million dollars for every time he called me an asshole via email I would be exactly 3 million dollars richer. I also enjoyed all the Avenged Sevenfold hatemail I received after reviewing “City Of Evil.” I had no idea people were so stupid.

Are you aware that some of the girls on your friends list have emo mullets?

Much to my dismay I was alerted to this 2 weeks ago. It was not my idea for this friend of mine to style her hair in that fashion so needless to say I am a tad forlorne.

Predator or The Terminator?

I would have to go with The Predator.

He managed to smite Carl Weathers who contrary to popular belief is a more perfect species of man than both Mr T and Vin Diesel combined.

What are your top 5 records of 2006 so far? What is the worst album you have heard?

1. The Lawrence Arms - Oh Calcutta!

2. Isis - In The Absence of Truth

3. Park - Building A Better _______

4. The Hold Steady - Boys and Girls in America

5. The Riverboat Gamblers - To The Confusion Of Our Enemies

The worst record I have heard this year is the Vanna album that Epitaph put out. The kids in that band should kill themselves, and Brett Gurweitz should be ashamed of himself for agreeing to put that album out. I heard from a reliable source that they only got signed because Epitaph felt they had to sign a “metalcore” band to compete with other labels metalcore sales.

Who is going to win the World Series?

I think Oakland has a shot this year. They have had a shitload of chances over the past few years, and they have manged to come up short. I think Oakland will beat the Twins and then go on to beat the Yankees or Detroit in the ALCS. There is no team in the NL who can match them. The world series goes to the American League this year for sure. I am just bummed the Red Sox aren’t in the post season this year. GO RED SOX!!!!!

Please use this time to start a flame war with the children at AbsolutePunk.net. We can use the traffic.

That website has more problems than Cambodia had during Pol Pots reign of terror. I really want to believe Jason Tate is a true music fan, but I just can’t. He gets butt hurt when other staff members get promos before him (that statement comes straight from the mouth of a current staff member of his website), and he manages to focus on the most inane aspects of music culture to attain visits to his website. I think he should just get it over with and sign an exclusive deal with US weekly to provide his readers with late breaking news on the latest Paris Hilton drama.

His website is kind of a Catch 22. I know for a fact that people who work for various record labels hate dealing with him, but he manages to rope a lot of unsuspecting people into reading his website which makes the idea of advertising with him almost unavoidable. He capitalizes on the igonorance of a lot of people. I gotta hand it to the kid though, he is a college graduate and he is smart, and he is damn good at giving the legions of lemmings that read his website what they want. Appealing to the lowest common demoninator is easy, but I think his website should try to push the envelope more often, and focus on bands that are actually doing something groundbreaking.

What do you love the most about Invisible Limb? You can choose more than one thing.

I enjoy how Invisible Limb covers music that is a little off kilter. The writers are talented ( more so than I could ever be as a writer) and I know I can always browse it and find great bands I have never heard of.

You have just started a metal band. What is your band name? What is the name of the all day fest you choose to make your live debut on?

I f I started a metal band they would surely be called Bent Rectum and I would hope that I wouldn’t need to start some sort of inane fest to preserve my bands memory. If I had to start one though, I would probably call it Remo Williams fest, in honor of one of the greatest action movies ever.

Do you want to start an all day fest with me? I know 107 local bands who would be interested.

I think if we started an all day fest it would just encourage 107 more shitty bands to form with the purpose of trying to get on our fest. With that said I would have to say no, and just hope you didn’t go along with the idea without my presence.

What are you going to tell your grand children when they ask you if you really used to write music reviews on the internet?

I would tell them that despite what Walter Kronkite said that fateful night, the war on Screamo can be won and that the Screamo-Offensive is no reflection on the actual amount of forces the Screamo-cong has in their capital of Scream-o-chi-minh-city.

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For more Barry goodness, check out his gang related profile.

[link] http://www.myspace.com/superawesomeguy